2026.08.05 - August reading

after not learning my lesson from my two month long journey with East of Eden and having a rough tumble trying to get through Haruki Murakami's thousand page "1Q84" (to the point where i received a notice from the library asking me to pay for the book, presuming i had lost it), i decided to try something a little shorter... and had an interesting time with Inuit throat singer Tanya Tagaq's "Split Tooth" - a rather intimate ride that i'm still not sure how i feel about. from that point i decided i'd had enough of escaping reality with fiction (if that says anything about my feelings) and took a dive into my local library's non-fiction section for the first time.

Paul Roland's "The Dark History of the Occult" was an interesting look at the subject; i enjoyed how he highlighted the bullshit backwards-ness of Christianity and its satanic panic, and the coverage on various key figures in the rise of dark arcane arts. as one StoryGraph reviewer said however, "everything in it should be taken with a grain of salt" as the list of sources in the back of the book is "concerningly short".

Indian-Canadian singer Bif Naked's memoir "I, Bificus" included another intimate look at childhood and growing up but from a more entirely biographical perspective than the semi-fictional/poetic one Split Tooth consisted of, based partly on Tanya Tagaq's journals. stories of sexual experiences can be uncomfortable to read, although they do make me feel better about my own various strange encounters. I, Bificus was a delightful read anyways, and gave me a newfound appreciation for Bif that spurred me on to give a full listen to her discography, which previously i was mostly unfamiliar with tbh.

Bif is a sweetheart. it's true.

though it was a very enjoyable read, finishing Bif's memoir marks the start of a break in taking trips to the library so i can catch up on some of the books that i own. while i want to always be supporting the library, i never seem to have enough hours in the day to fit all of the things i want to do. one of those things is getting a grip on the mental hang-ups i've been stuck with time and time again, and without access to a decent therapist i've had to turn to self-help books for that.

Daniel Howell's "You Will Get Through This Night" so far has been providing the parasocial familiarity of reading something written by one half of my comfort youtubers Dan and Phil, with his usual comedic spin on things. Russ Harris' "The Happiness Trap" was recommended to me by a friend, and i've been itching to get further into its techniques for accepting that i will inevitably have negative thoughts and learning how to not let them take over.

following a rewatch of the first two Madoka Magica movies as well as a brand new watch of the third (with the fourth arriving on the near horizon), i fell in love with Gekidan INU Curry's art of the witches and labyrinths in Madoka - to the point i bought a Japanese only graphic novel of theirs. i've been having a good time recently with finding inspiration, with the La Dispute album i discussed in the previous blog post leading me to find bassist Adam Vass' "Pareidolia": a collection of collages he put together while recording the album.

as someone who decided to get into scrapbooking throughout 2025, but ultimately hit a block with my artistic process come 2026, the rawness seen in Pareidolia and Gekidan INU Curry's works really got something going in me. i'm hoping that by reading Gerald Brommer's "Collage Techniques" and Eva Minguet's collection of interviews titled "The Art of Collage" i will gain some insight on the medium and maybe even unlock some new inspiration to get past my block.

it's been a decent year so far aside from a depressive slump i went through around my birthday in June, but as i've learned in The Happiness Trap this is bound to happen, especially given my mental health disorder. i hope to move forward with the ability to recognize it as it happens and not get helplessly absorbed in it, and to continue to find inspiration to create, to manifest, and to leave an indent other than the one in my computer chair.